Toddler Talk. The noises junior humans make as they create language pathways in the brain.
This week, I dipped into my meagre energy savings, and visited people I adore, that I'm proud of, and I'm lucky enough to somehow be family to, despite being related to none of them. It's been a while since I've been around a toddler - I've got other family and friends with younglings; but toddlers are their own class of people.
This week, I dipped into my meagre energy savings, and visited people I adore, that I'm proud of, and I'm lucky enough to somehow be family to, despite being related to none of them. It's been a while since I've been around a toddler - I've got other family and friends with younglings; but toddlers are their own class of people.
Small humans are as diverse and fascinating as any other group of people. Yet they're harder to get to know. A small person's vocabulary is still being filled with words, and a conversation is an exercise in patience. Truly junior humans, are even harder, as their words are barely that. With all of them, the trick seems to be giving them a gap long enough to figure out what they want to say. Even the wee-est seems to understand that I don't understand, and will try to find a different path of expression.
Maybe this is something we grown-ups should try and remember. The hard stuff is difficult to talk about. The words aren't commonly used, so it takes a while to get the right ones. Anyone struggling can try and tell you they're in trouble, but the words won't quite be right, and the import of what is trying to be conveyed is lost. So far, in all my various groups, chats, sessions, and appointments, a common thread is "I'm tired".
Three incredibly simple words.
Maybe this is something we grown-ups should try and remember. The hard stuff is difficult to talk about. The words aren't commonly used, so it takes a while to get the right ones. Anyone struggling can try and tell you they're in trouble, but the words won't quite be right, and the import of what is trying to be conveyed is lost. So far, in all my various groups, chats, sessions, and appointments, a common thread is "I'm tired".
Three incredibly simple words.
- I - a Pronoun, replacement of a name.
- am - a Preposition, describing the relationship between a pronoun/noun and an adjective.
- tired. - an Adjective, the naming of an attribute.
So, this simple sentence isn't, of itself, indicative of anything much. Most people assume, on hearing this information, that the person they're speaking to, needs a rest, some sleep, or maybe a holiday.
For those of us struggling, this simple sentence is the iggle-aggle-oddle-adle-ay of learning how to describe what we're going through. We're not tired, not exactly. We just don't have the correct words to explain what we feel. Even now, quite far along my climb through the Everest of my Depression, I haven't figured out the words to explain how I feel, what I need, or what kind of assistance might help. I may as well be speaking in 'toddler'.
Parents of toddlers are fairly amazing at how well they can interpret their tiny person's oggle-idee-barbaaaa's. Counselors, therapists, psychologists, psychiatrists, and other mental health experts are pretty good at deciphering my diddle-doddle-gog's, and my doctor is very good at asking for their help in translating.
Even if I move my analogy up the age groups to small-persons, youngsters who can speak clearly, but don't have a wide range of words yet, it's like the kidlet complaining of a head-ache in their stomach. The child understands the concept of a head-ache, and though their complaint is not the same as a stomach ache, the sensation is similar enough that it makes complete sense to them to describe it as such.
So do those of us struggling. Being Depressed, Anxious, Bi-polar, or similar, means we can say we're tired, because that's so very close to how it actually feels. Even though it's not the same, not anything close, but it has many of the same symptoms. I hardly ever feel rested. I don't feel I have the energy to achieve anything, I have to consider how difficult things will be, and I have to allow for how demanding emotionally something might be. It's 'tired' but it's not 'tired'.
Ultimately, I've come home after a week with people important to my heart, with another insight into my own state of being. I relate to not being able to properly explain what I'm going through, and I also saw, that I have people around me desperately trying to understand. Showing me love and patience while I figure out how to explain what I need, trying to decipher my iggle-aggle's so they can help me achieve what I need to.
For those of us struggling, this simple sentence is the iggle-aggle-oddle-adle-ay of learning how to describe what we're going through. We're not tired, not exactly. We just don't have the correct words to explain what we feel. Even now, quite far along my climb through the Everest of my Depression, I haven't figured out the words to explain how I feel, what I need, or what kind of assistance might help. I may as well be speaking in 'toddler'.
Parents of toddlers are fairly amazing at how well they can interpret their tiny person's oggle-idee-barbaaaa's. Counselors, therapists, psychologists, psychiatrists, and other mental health experts are pretty good at deciphering my diddle-doddle-gog's, and my doctor is very good at asking for their help in translating.
Even if I move my analogy up the age groups to small-persons, youngsters who can speak clearly, but don't have a wide range of words yet, it's like the kidlet complaining of a head-ache in their stomach. The child understands the concept of a head-ache, and though their complaint is not the same as a stomach ache, the sensation is similar enough that it makes complete sense to them to describe it as such.
So do those of us struggling. Being Depressed, Anxious, Bi-polar, or similar, means we can say we're tired, because that's so very close to how it actually feels. Even though it's not the same, not anything close, but it has many of the same symptoms. I hardly ever feel rested. I don't feel I have the energy to achieve anything, I have to consider how difficult things will be, and I have to allow for how demanding emotionally something might be. It's 'tired' but it's not 'tired'.
Ultimately, I've come home after a week with people important to my heart, with another insight into my own state of being. I relate to not being able to properly explain what I'm going through, and I also saw, that I have people around me desperately trying to understand. Showing me love and patience while I figure out how to explain what I need, trying to decipher my iggle-aggle's so they can help me achieve what I need to.
It's been a loooong week. Worth every second. But now I'm going to bed. For maybe a month. Because, I'm tired.
Derri.
Derri.
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